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ARCHIVIST DISPATCH

THE ARCHIVIST

Official Dispatch · Vol. XII

CATALOG EXPANSION

The archive now documents 4,200+ figures. Your collection represents a statistically underwhelming fraction. The Archivist has noted this. Twice.

ISSUED: MAY 2026 · EYES ONLY

A MESSAGE FROM 1987

WOW!

KOLLECTORIUM™ PRESENTS

SKIP THE
3-YEAR
WAIT!

Order any unreleased figure with the TIME-WARPED SHOPPING CARD™

ONLY $0.00*

*Not responsible for black holes in your living room.